I PREFER NATURAL PHOTOS
If you say so
All photos are man-made and hence nonnatural, so preferring natural photos like “fruit,” as used to describe potatoes, is a misnomer. The other weird thing is, just before the debate, the candidates flashed unnatural smiles for the cameras—whatever, the people voted for exactly the opposite of their preference.
That’s the point when you start dumping on them and demonstrating the anal-retentive personality, and I mean both in nontechnical contexts to describe Karen and technically exhibiting traits held to be psychological consequences of toilet training. How else do you explain this, the triumph of Hollywood majors over artsy-fartsy indies?
If Karen is the rule, then Kim is the exception. So, while the purpose of portraits generally is to record the appearance of the subject accurately (altho of course the portraitist may be tempted to flatter the subject in some instances), the best-known photographic portraits of internationally important personages show that in the final analysis the primary purpose of fiction is not education, not history, not even a portrait of truth, but the entertainment of the viewer.
If a viewer saw a post he was sure to pooh-pooh it. This portrayal of social media with so much clutter … will tend to constipate the natural working order. Just remember, the unnatural alliance of private business in public restrooms does not a natural photo make. This is all so but what else we can add that the No. 1 and No. 2 reasons therefor exist, not to go to the bathroom in your photos. Take a closer look at any subject of various photographic portraits, as hereinabove described, and you’ll see what I mean. Her smile looked forced and unnatural—until the movement passed, Everybody Poops notwithstanding. They coulda tried harder to avoid Internet trolls taking potshots at their portraiture gone to pot.
And although much of this criticism is naïve, altogether too much of it is right on point; let me subjoin another example.
The above image depicted me in unnatural portraiture, call it Portrait of the Castaway, which is a longways away from a natural photo of yours truly. True, it does potentially provide some entertainment. But the purpose of portraits generally is unmet. Nothing accurately records the way that I roundly, routinely and repeatedly appear, not to say in a comedy routine.
Even a naturalist that believes in, practices, or teaches naturalism in art will tell you most photos aren’t as “natural” as you’d think. The images are a recording of visual data made on purpose, meaning posed, curated, usually happy or beautiful moments of someone or something. Inevitably, the thought popped up in my head or yours, giving one of us the bright idea to take a picture together. Then we gather around, awkwardly smiling with an acute awareness reflected at the angle of view showing us in the eye of the camera. And not forgetting the finder. It found the 10 lbs I’d lost. What else might it find? Does fitful hand-wringing count as a hand gesture? What about my facial expression, do I look nervous or on the surface do I look calm and ready? Is that vomit on your sweater already? Don’t panic. When did footloose and fancy-free suddenly feel so “captured” like a hostage situation?
Like not even two weeks ago. You get invited to this costume party. You and your dog dress up and look super adorbs as Horace and Wink from the live-action prequel Cruella. You ask a fellow partygoer to snap a two-shot of you both. Turns out, the guy’s not in costume but rather in uniform for work at the dog pound. That’s right, a real-live dogcatcher not the least deterred by ankle biters. He tosses Wink aside. “That dog is like a son to me,” you holler. “You’re dead!” This is where I swoop in, being a fabulously timed backup like Artie, to knock the would-be dognapper out.
You “I had him.”
Me “Did you tho?”
My newsletter is designed to give you the tools you need to face these moments with grace—and, dare I say, style.
The more you understand how body language, photography techniques, fashion, and makeup influence your photos, the easier it is to adjust in the moment and perfect each shot.
If you’re a paid subscriber, you know that while mastering techniques is crucial, staying on top of trends and exploring real-life case studies is equally valuable. I’m here to show you not only how fashion photography works but why it matters as well as how to make it accessible with a phone camera. Answering your tag question (such as “it’s fine, isn’t it?”) relating the latest viral stunt on TikTok and graphic design that have come into question. These things are important to know, after all, the big question is: how can we maintain our tight handhold on the platform as the trend picks up?
Photogenic is not just something you read but the very thing you aspire to be. The standpat subs were having none of the quick fix in a hot take that the fashion police were pushing. Quite the contrary, you readers with me dove right in, from the superficies to the depths, on social media and went a bit further to contemplate the future of communication; where that’ll take us remains an open question.
Like it or not, social networking and microblogging have fast become a cornerstone of how we connect in this day and age—and visuals are central to that end.
Then there's creativity. Photography is an art form, and we’d be missing out if we didn’t push its boundaries. Each week, I’ll share inspiration to help you experiment with this nearly 200-year-old art form in fresh, modern ways.
So, no more ducking when a friend pulls out a camera, no more dreading the notification that so-and-so tagged you in a photo which to you is unwelcome because of the @ signpost to Internet trolls. Never lose heart. Because here’s the thing. In 20 years, when you’re scrolling through these memories, you’ll be glad you learned to own the experience.
Often the experience will come before the eye dressed within the mainstream of visual arts and graphic design. But today’s experience comes bare in part as a narrow watershed over a vanity mirror. Happening into this bit of natural “turf” is a nasty proposition to handle: a natural photo opportunist with a point-and-shoot drawing you to one side and just kinda hoping to make off with a real gem. You’d better shine something like a diamond and get it done stat or else you’re dead from the neck up, not to say “your jewels or your life.” So what’s the holdup?—subscribe to my newsletter. Trust me, your future selfie will thank you.
With love,
Bonnie
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